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Endgame

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Endgame

Endgame in all of his repulsiveness.

Endgame (who also goes by the name of emagdnE) is one of the most horrible, unholy monsters to ever live. He is a very persistent and vile Troll who plagues many various boards on GameFAQs.

He claims to be in love with a girl from some shitty pay2win korean game, but we all know he's gay. Really gay. For Hitler.

GameFAQs Activity

Endgame has, despite all logic, held on to his original GameFAQs account since December 4th 2001. Truly a testament to the incompetence of the GameFAQs Moderators. Over the years he has become known for hating on everything. More recently, he wages an ongoing war against the good and decent Nintendo fanbase, believing that Satoru Iwata has "ruined Nintendo". He is also known for hating on jRPGs, labeling them as "interactive movies that recycle the same damn shounen anime plot and characters over again." And most disturbingly, praying for the "Second Video Game Industry Crash" to "wipe the slate clean".

But his lasting legacy on the GameFAQs community and the internet at large is how on the Pokémon: Ruby/Sapphire board, (which was originally one board for one game before they split it in two boards for both versions) where he coined the phrase "HOT SKITTY ON WAILORD ACTION!" in a discussion of how Wailord, one of the largest pokémon, can breed with Skitty. A small cat pokémon.

Historians to this day cannot figure out just what the hell led to a sick bastard such as Endgame.

Fire Emblem: Awakening Board Activity

Endgame has been, and still is a very active poster on the Fire Emblem: Awakening board. Making claims such as that Fire Emblem: Gaiden. Fire Emblem:Sacred Stones. Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance, Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn. and Fire Emblem: Awakening are "not real Fire Emblems". Mostly based off of how they are "braindead easy" and "lack strategy". In the case of Awakening, he focuses on Sorcerers using Nosferatu and Optimization. arguing that Awakening is "too easily broken". He also chides on the game for being a "Waifu factory" game but having "hideous female character designs." But he has taken a stance on many, many things over his tenure on the Awakening board.

Sexual Relations With a Catfish
Catfish

The catfish Endgame had sex with.

During his middle school days, Endgame had sex with a catfish.

Nobody knows why.

Criticism of Awakening

Here are some of his arguments as to why Fire Emblem: Awakening is a bad game:

  • It is "way too easy even on Lunatic+".
  • The chapter designs are uninspired. Enemy units are just "vomited all over the maps randomly" and that the enemy units "just rush you".
  • Pair Up is a "gamebreaking feature" that is available only to the player and not the AI.
  • The removal of the WT stat on weapons and staves that inflict status effects "dumb down the game and remove potential strategy".
  • There is "too much focus on dating sim elements".
  • More to the point, he hates the game's art style and believes that most of the female characters are "ugly".

Lissa

For some reason, Endgame is very focused on Lissa and has made many posts about how much he hates her. To the point where people believed he was tsundere for her, spawning EndgamexLissa. For some reason, shiningpikablu252 has taken a special interest in debunking this pairing.

He has insulted her in various ways. Calling her a "hideous abomination", "fashion terrorist", and "spawn of Cthulhu". He tries to argue his point that she is Cthulhus spawn with the following arguments:
Lissasad

Why is he so mean to me?!

  • Lissa's father went crazy and declared war on Plegia after Lissa was born. He believes this to be a result of meeting Cthulhu, who is said to be horrible beyond human comprehension that anyone who simply sees him goes insane.
  • Owain's "sword hand" that he cannot control is a mutation as a result of his unholy lineage.
  • Lissa complains about not having the Mark of the Exalt. Endgame argues that Naga denied her one because of her unholy lineage.
  • Her dress is "unholy", a "cage that traps souls", and "could have only been crafted by otherworldly abominations".

Nowi

Endgame has also taken a hard stance on Nowi, (and to a lesser extent her daughter Nah) believing her to be a "hypersexualized little girl" and "pedobait". He also goes on to say that "I thought that even Satoru Iwata's Nintendo was above this."

Many are quick to point out that Nowi is over 1000 years old, making her older than any human and far beyond the age of consent. Endgame however, argues the following:
Nowimad

Whatever. Jerk.

  • That Dragons age much more slowly, and therefore that Nowi is still a child. He also goes on to argue that "you don't have this excuse with Nah", which the players can also choose to marry.
  • That age of consent laws were not made with Dragons, or any other species for that matter, in mind.
  • That Nowi is clearly designed to resemble a young human child and that it ultimately does not matter because Nintendo's intentions with the character were clear: "She was designed to appeal to the lolicon crowd".

Such arguments are (thankfully) less frequent, but he is quick to leap into any topic where the subject comes up.

Emmeryn

One day, Gold Vanguard posted a topic titled "Emmeryn is such a lovely lady." It was full of mean spirited jokes aimed at Emmeryn's apparent suicide at the end of Chapter 9.

Although he did not start the Emmeryn puns, he is the most active about making them. He still does it to this day, and quite honestly, he's running them into the ground.

Breaking Awakening

See main article: Optimization

Endgame has come up with many methods as to how to "break Awakening into millions of tiny pieces". Most notably when he shows his nazi side by shoving his "Optimal pairings" down everyone's throat and saying that Laurent, Kjelle, Nah, and Yarne are "worthless" for not being suited for Dark Flier, Sage, or just plain not getting Galeforce.

His first major push to try to say that Awakening was "braindead easy" and this a "terrible game" was a YouTube video showing gameplay of Chapter 23 on Lunatic+. The video featured Pr. Marth reclassed as a Sorcerer and using Nosferatu. The uploader's channel was taken down for copyright infringement. Yet, Endgame kept on going around posting the link to the video for months before he found out the video was taken down. Dumbass.

But when a new uploader started uploading videos of Apotheosis, he ditched Nosfertanking as the end all be all way to break the game and started preaching pairing up Dark Fliers and Sages and based his "optimal pairings" around that setup.

Stance on Unicorns

Unicorn

You think I'm girly, punk?!

Endgame believes that unicorns are, contrary to popular belief, the manliest of all horses. His reasons for his belief:

  • They tend to be white stallions. The favored steed of heroes.
  • They have HORNS. Horns being a phallic object and associated with masculinity, as males of any given horned species tend to have bigger horns.
  • They charge things and stab them with their horns.

We should probably take his word for it. He IS gay after all. And no one's bigger experts on manliness than the gays.

Battles With Westbrick

See main article: Westbrick

Endgame and Westbrick were mortal enemies. Endgame as the game's most persistent critic. Westbrick as the game's greatest defender. He even wrote a 10/10 review of Awakening.

Over time, Westbrick was corrupted from too much exposure to Endgame's unholiness. He then ended up becoming the very thing he fought against: a vile Troll who spoke blasphemy about the perfect game that is Fire Emblem: Awakening. He even took down his 10/10 review and replaced it with a 4/10 review. It has since been taken down after multiple complaints of it being a "Troll review".

And more disturbingly, Westbrick became Endgame's lover! However, he eventually left the Awakening board completely and has not been seen since.

Endgame longs for the day his lover returns.

Endgame's Guide to Dominating the Game

Endgame wrote an early guide to his Optimization methods. He called it "Endgame's Guide to Dominating the Game". It explained his "optimal pairings", Nosfertanking, and his Dark Flier and Sage combo at length. He posted it as soon as Awakening was released in North America.

The topic became stickied. However, people complained about it being a blatant Troll topic and got it unstickied. However, enough people claimed that despite Endgame's obvious intention, the topic did have useful information. It was stickied again. This went back and forth a few times, causing much rage on the forums.

It has gone through two revisions. The third post of each topic was by Westbrick posting "lol".

Unappreciation Topics

Being the hateful monster that he is, Endgame has started the trend of posting Unappreciation Topics dedicated to hating on all the characters of Awakening. He started with "The Official Lissa Unappreciation" topic and continued on from there. Saying that "everyone gets one" except for Anna. For even a foul beast like him fears the RNG Goddess.

At the end of each of these dumb topics, he has an ongoing segment which he adds on to with each new topic about how "On Sunday, 28 June 1914, at approximately 10:45 am, Franz Ferdinand and his wife were killed in Sarajevo, the capital of the Austro-Hungarian province of Bosnia and Herzegovina, by Gavrilo Princip.

Lissa made him do it."

Each new addition to this nonsensical story about how Lissa started World War 1 includes how the character the topic is dedicated to hating on helped lead to Lissa being able to accomplish this. With Tharja teaching her the hexes she used because Ricken got Tharja drunk trying to "score" with her. It goes on and on.

Endgame's CYOA

See main article: Endgame's Magical Awakening Adventure!

In more recent times, Endgame has taking to writing a CYOA. It is about him going around with Valflame and pretty much screwing up everything and getting away with it. The constant references to sexual acts with Grima leads us to believe that there is something very wrong with Endgame. But if you've been reading this article, you should already know that Endgame is a sick bastard.

Relationships

Westbrick: Supreme Blazing Romantic Passionate Scorching Homoerotic Love.

shiningpikablu252: Endgame-Senpai REFUSES to notice him.

Federico585:

Fede: "EGxSevera is officially confirmed! I'm sure Endgame can't wait to hear the news!"
Endgame: "Oh **** you."
Fede: "Does this mean you'll accept my friend request if I send you one?"

Trivia

  • Contrary to popular belief, Endgame cannot be paired with Lissa. You're probably thinking of that glitch character that appears whenever you try to unlock Endgame and do it incorrectly; you know you did it incorrectly, and thus got the glitch character, when you see the phrase "Yummy! Skitty pancakes!" (the real Endgame says "Hot Skitty on Wailord Action!). The glitch character comes with an automatic S support with Lissa, even going as far as to override things if Lissa was already married off (the real Endgame has only the typical My Unit support chain as well as a very boring A-rank chain with Priam--the dialogue is pretty much forgettable the moment it goes offscreen). The glitch character's modifiers are so pathetic that they make the worst possible Owain, even going as far as to start Owain off with an F rank in swords--insufficient even for a Bronze Sword, Glass Sword, or Tree Branch.
  • His three most hated Awakening characters are Lissa, Tharja, and Severa. Yep. TOTALLY gay.
  • He has expressed lust towards Finn of Fire Emblem: Thracia 776 fame. Stating that Finn can "capture me with his Hero Lance any time."
  • He's gay for Hitler. Hitler dammit! HITLER!

External Links

Endgame torturing prisoners with his so called "singing"

An example of one of his stupid Unappreciation Topics

The original "Endgame's Guide to Dominating the Game"

The most recent topic of his stupid CYOA

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